Too much social media? Fuck you…

Your social media pages could be the only map of your personality that they can use to bring you back as a Cylon. POST ALL THE THINGS.

Little Runaway

I imagine you a lot these days. I can see you putting out your hand and closing your fist around thin air, wondering when you’re going to catch something worth holding onto. Right now you’d just settle for something worth losing. Because you have nothing… except for time… and even that is slipping through your fingers. 

These days I feel like I’m stuck inside of myself, just running in place. Getting absolutely nowhere in record time… But yeah, that’s just me being ungrateful. I have so much inside of this little red dot that’s labeled "YOU ARE HERE."

I have a bad ass girl gang in my corner. We inhale smoke and exhale excellence. We’re glad girls who only want to get you high. We get down on good tunes and bad snack foods. We get back up on cuddles and anti-depressants. Our motto is hugs and drugs… and STOP STARING AT MY FUCKING TITS OR I WILL CUT YOU.

I’ve got a good ass job under my belt. Pretty soon I’ll be able to eat 3 meals a day and still have money left over to repay uncle Sam for the education I can’t actually seem to finish. I can bleach my roots and dye my hair another brilliant color. 

i have a partner who loves me… even if he doesn’t always seem to understand what he’s in love with…

The problem is that no matter how lovely this little space I’ve found myself in is, I’m still confined inside of it. For someone who’s spent most of my life trying to escape into some other, more interesting, sphere of reality it’s hard for me to shake the prison break mentality.

My muscle memory keeps my mind sprinting ahead, urging me to leave my heart behind, while my body bounces against invisible walls. 

And I want to run, but I’m so tired of being a little runaway.

PSA PSA PSA

poetic-roses:

I’m doing a project called #LIVE and I’m collecting photos of people holding up a sign that says #LIVE and a short written statement (think HONY) about anything to do with suicide prevention- why it’s important, why we should be open about it, what you might say to someone going through that, etc…anything along those lines. It would mean a lot to me if you could participate, it’s really quick- just write ‘#LIVE’ on a piece of paper, have someone take a picture of you holding it, and send it to me with a written statement at either (a) a direct message on my Instagram, @elxtric_emily (B) my email, writer2b2@gmail.com

It’s really important to me and it’s certainly for a really important cause. Hundreds of thousands of people attempt suicide every day and unfortunately, some will succeed in ending their lives. Please consider participating/promoting to remind those who are dealing with feelings of depression and suicidal ideation that they are not alone and that there is hope. You can see examples at www.instagram.com/liveproject2014.

Sometimes I think someone dreamed me up as their fantasy girl. To the person who imagined me, I was perfect… and then they died… and now I’m too specifically abstract to ever really be loved. I belong to no one… but I used to be someone’s dream girl.  

I miss you in ways that haven’t even been invented yet.

TMI Confession

I need to be properly fucked… It’s driving me crazy. I’ve never felt less fuckable.

davidwduffy replied to your post: Celestial Nobody

But the falling debris always looks more spectacular, if only for a moment. :)

Until you think, “OH CRAP, I’m about to die a horrible, flaming death!” ;)

We were… We are… We will.. blah, blah, blah.

You were an unintended reason to strive for something I never thought I could attain… I really can’t tell you exactly what that thing was. Maybe it was lasting happiness, sexual satisfaction, or a feeling like I belonged somewhere; to someone. When I met you, I was living with one foot in the grave. I was so numb inside that I forgot what it felt to be anything at all. I saw you standing there, peeking at me from the other side of the void. Well, you were kind of creeping… then you were flat out staring me down. You made me realize that I had nothing to lose, because I had nothing that made me feel the way I did just knowing that you existed. My want for you gave me a reason to exist. And you wanted me back. 

We were a nursery of collapsing stars, sending out waves of cosmic stuff to the far corners of the universe. We were the alpha and omega. We were the beginning and end of everything…

You are my favorite person in this dimension of reality. The connection I feel to you makes me suspect that I fancy you in at least 95% of all parallel universes. You are the love of my life.

We are inter-dimensional interlopers, leaping from instance to instance, jumping paradigms, and recording all of the pertinent details in the language of sighs and heartbeats. We are galactic refugees. We are stranger strangers in an ordinary world…

You will always be able to find me no matter how far we stray. I’m here for you… I belong to you forever and always; in one form or another. Maybe not always the way you want or need me, but there’s a part of me that will always feel like it’s actually a part of you.

We will…

[Signal Lost]

UFO Rental

And when my heart misses someone — even if my brain tells me how stupid it is — I feel like an abandoned starship idling outside of a cosmic liquor store.

Celestial Nobody

There are a million beautiful girls on the internet. They twinkle on your screen like the planet Venus, when it’s shinning at its brightest against the night sky. There’s so many pretty girls in this digital world to tease and delight you… but I’m not one of them. I’m no celestial body… I’m a burning chunk of satellite racing towards earth to put you in the ground. Run.

Deep Space

You’re a pinhole in the windshield of my ufo. An invisible presence that I can’t see or feel, but I know eventually will lead to my downfall. Please don’t let me die alone, suffocating on all of this time and space. I don’t want to hover and then suddenly crash and burn… I just want to free fall forever, into the deep abyss of you.